Eliteslayer

All I wanted was to catch them all. It started out so innocently. You grow up in a Pokemon world, wanting nothing more than to be a Pokemon trainer. So when the professor offers you a chance to start your own Pokemon journey, to catch them all, of course you accept, who wouldn’t? Yeah, it was all just Pidgeys and Rattatas at first. The Professor wanted them, so I sent them over; I kept getting stronger Pokemon, and the Professor was getting Pokemon for his research. I didn’t care for what - track their migration patterns, train them, test cosmetics on them, I dunno, it wasn’t any of my business. All that mattered to me was

On the twelfth regeneration, the Doctor gave to me: Twelve angry eyebrows Eleven Jammie Dodgers Ten loud “Allons-y”s Nine Daleks dying Eight draughts a-drinking Seven cool umbrellas Six clashing colors Five celery! Four jelly babes Three fight scenes Two recorder songs And a trip in a time machine.

M: Let’s face it, Ash… anything you can do, I can do better. A: What!? M: I can do anything better than you. A: No you can’t. M: Yes I can. A: No you can’t! M: Yes I can, watch me, Ash! A: Anything you can train, I can make greater. And not much later, my team’s greater than yours. M: No it’s not. A: Yes it is. M: No it’s not. A: Yes it is. M: No it’s not! A: Yes it is, yes it is A: I can beat a Slaking, Without even blinking. M: I can beat an Aggron, Any time just for fun. A: I can win at any gym! M: But are you the champ? A: No… M: Nice try, you scamp. A: Any move you can use, I can u

Gosh it excites me to speak with da boss, After our mission went down. All of our knees get all weak near da boss, Just from a stare and a frown. There’s none in Team Rocket respected as him, Throughout Viridian City. We don’t even care we’re neglected by him, And the reason is quite clear to see… No one’s tough as da boss, Has that stuff like da boss, No one looks quite as good in the buff like da boss. For there’s no one in Rocket as manly, Full of ambition and brawn. You can ask Archer, Domino, or Cass’dy, And they’ll tell you what Team they are proud to be on! No one shouts like da boss! C

Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magikarp! (Karp!) Caught myself a Magikarp Tell you why: Because Gyarados is super fly. And if he can pull off a Dragon Dance Team Rocket won’t stand a chance Against my Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magikarp! (Karp!) Swifter than speedsters in the rain Attacks with Splash, Tackle, or Flail Leveling him up may seem like a pain But Magikarp - won’t fail! Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magikarp, Magikarp Oh, Magi Magi Magi Magi

[Sung to the tune of "Hooked on a Feeling"] (Ludi-Ludi-Ludicolo Ludi-Ludi-Ludicolo Ludi-Ludi-Ludicolo Ludi-Ludi-Ludicolo) My team needs some healing, Please help fix them up. Joy, I need a bit of of Your sweet healing touch. When you put them, On that cure machine, I know you are The best nurse for me, I-I-I I'm hooked on your healing! My Pokemon are reeling Oh won't you help my team? Lips sweet as Rare Candy You level up my heart. Love is a gym battle I'm ready to start. I'll give my badge to you girl, For when our match is through We’ll find the Poke Center And get help from you. You make me feel Like I've got Pokerus. Oh come

February 10th, 2014. 11:01 AM Booking is hell. If you are reading this, then maybe I have managed to survive. Or maybe you’re just reading the last words of a dead man. A dead man who couldn’t book a room for Fanime. It all started innocently enough. People were waiting for the rooms to go live, as they do every year. But each year, it grew harder and harder to get in on time, and it seemed we’d lose a few good men each time around. Then, not even weeks before, the news struck: only registered guests could book a room. A quiet panic spread, and those who were waiting to register rushed to the site, lest they lose their

Carry on, my Pokemon There'll be peace when Rocket's gone. Restore your HP with Rest You can fight some more. Once I cured away the Burn and Confusion, My attack broke through Zorua's Illusion. I thought my moves would hit first But Crobat used fly. Though my team could win I still was in trouble, Though I was one those two had made it double. I hear their motto, they keep screaming, 'Till they make me say: Carry on, my Pokemon There'll be peace when Rocket's gone. Restore your HP with Rest You can fight some more. Opposing them as a man with Jigglypuff Its Facade is a move that hits them tough. And if I have to use a potion, well, It sur

Let's get down to business To defeat the twerp! Why would you use Zubat? You know that won't work. You're the lamest grunts I'll ever see, But soon as we Are done with you You'll be a Rocket Grunt Through and through. Tranquil as Meditite, Burning like Moltres. Once you find their weakness, Their moves will hurt less. You're a brainless, weak, crossdressing lot, And you're all without merit. Somehow you'll Work here in Team Rocket! "I'm never gonna catch that rat." "Pikachu electrocute me…" "Maybe I should train at Pewter City Gym." "I just want to get Crobat." "One more day like this? Just shoot me." "How was I to kno

Hey! Clear the way to the sail barge Hey you! Let him through, Cuz he's living large. Oh come, Be the first to bow down before him. Make way! Here he comes! Get Reebo's band on the drums, Oh you're gonna fear this guy! Lord Jabba! This here fella, Is a Hutt gangster. Your best bet, is to respect His majesty. Now try to not cross his path, Or you will feel his wrath And be frozen on the wall for all to see! Lord Jabba, one hell of a Mighty Hutt gangster! Bow your head, Or you'll be dead, As Rancor feed. He sent hunters for Solo, Who had nowhere left to go, Could he escape us? No! Jabba caught him! He's got seventy-fiv